I got to watch a guild exodus again.
Except this time, I was on the other side. The leaving side.
The GL had actually been gone for a bit. He was taking a break until Cataclysm because the game just wasn’t interesting anymore. That’s totally understandable.
On my level — granted, I didn’t log for much more than the raid times — I hadn’t really noticed anything splitting off. But apparently it had been brewing for a while. Long enough that before the actual spin-off, the new founders had been preparing a guild websites and guild bank and Vent server among other things.
So unlike my tattered Robes, this was a bit more planned and expected. I was also told about it beforehand; though, I admit, I was still caught off guard because I didn’t think the announcement would happen the following raid night. Especially since that following raid night was only a day later.
But I feel mostly surprise, not really shock. The surprise isn’t really bad surprise, just “Oh! … well, okay.” I have a feeling that had I been around as long as, say, Lissanna, I’d be having some more emotion about it. I also might be having some more emotion if I had thought of the guild as a place to call home.
I’d mostly been there for raiding. I was still too hurt from the Robes and Real Life to really start trying to bond into another family again. I mostly cared about how I could get up to Conspirator or Renegade rank or just not hug the bottom of the meters rather than just being Accomplice all the time.
Just as the summer ended, I was not really caring what my raider rank was anymore. I could have been switched to Family & Friends and probably would not have cared or noticed.
Tonight in raid, I managed to get up on the visible portion of my Skada window several times. Tonight, I didn’t come to down bosses, I didn’t come to try again for uber DPS, I didn’t come to wish my socks off that I could maneuver quickly in 5 fps. Tonight, I came to play with 24+ other people whom I’ve now found are really fun to play with.
<Conspiracy> is still there, of course. Amadruada is still in Conspiracy, but I haven’t logged on her in forever anyway. I’m not quite sure what I’m doing with her. If ever she becomes actively raiding again, she will probably come over to UR.
UR. <Undying Resolution>. That’s my new tag.
Now that I’m on the opposite of the exodus, I feel like I need to reflect. Not just to make some blog post about it, or even to rage it all out. More to sort out where I’ve been, where I am, where I’m going. There’s change in the winds for the entire game, so I might as well.
As they quit the guild, they keep telling you they still love you.
So part of me wants to go, because it realizes I might not be happy here.
I don’t want to hurt the friends still here. Because I would be saying I’m leaving and still loving them, but leaving doesn’t feel like loving at all.
Lines from a wall I wrote a while back on saying goodbye. It still expresses how I feel about leaving. These lines still stick out at me, over half a year later. But then I read the whole thing again.
I even cried some. Again. I also smiled some.
I still use my Dreadsteed. Even when idling in Ruby Sanctum, everybody pulls out their awesome mounts. The Zulian Tiger. Rivendare’s Horse. Grand Ice Mammoths and Traveler’s Tundra Mammoths. Motorcycles.
I’ve tried pulling out things like the Talbuks, my Zhevra (eww, its butt is STILL too big), but I always come back to my Dreadsteed. It just doesn’t feel right otherwise.
I also drool over the Twilight Drakes of guildies. The Twilight Drake is my favorite flying mount in the game. It’s SO PRETTY. I’d still ride my Carpet, though, and save the Drake for special occasions or when it’s Special Mount Idling Time. Actually, a guildy with the pretty drake reminded me tonight.
I was flying around the basement of Wyrmrest Temple after a Halion kill and found this guildy on the pretty drake. I flew up to her (well, it’s a she draenei toon) and did the /drool emote. She said in /say that she wanted my carpet like I wanted her drake. Thanks, Richochet.
Remembering my carpet and my dreadsteed reminded me of what I wrote a long time ago. It’s the other part that sticks out now, but I had to really pay attention for it to pop out.
Well, it took me a while to figure out that raiding is not the actual end-game. Not to me, anyway. My guild is the end-game. Playing with people I care about, even though I’ve never met them beyond their online avatars.
That’s why I jumped ship. I want to raid, and I love to raid with the people who left, so I’m going with them. I’d already said how the RL (who is now my new GL) was one of the few RLs I’m comfortable asking stupid raid questions when I think of them. Considering my current mental/emotional issues, that’s means a lot to me.
So no, I don’t terribly care if I kill the Lich King before Cataclysm drops. It’s not the kills that I raid for.
The Road Goes Ever On
As the RL was explaining the about-to-leave situation on Vent, I noticed Murf was online via my RealID. I told him I was finding myself at another guild exodus, except this time I was on the opposite side. I told him it was mostly the raiders splitting off, and that the split seemed to originate (at least, from my perspective) from the officer core.
He told me that’s how the old Vanilla Robes split began. Not the split I witnessed, but one that happened before I even bought WoW. One that a fair bit of the Robes I knew were present for.
I told him that I hope the friendships in <Conspiracy> and <Undying Resolution> are just as strong as the Robes’ were. Consider how the Robes survived for five years — FIVE YEARS under ONE guild tag — with multiple ex-Robes leaving and coming back again and again. It still survives, I’m sure of it, if maybe not under that exact tag anymore.
So here’s to friends, old and new, same or different tag, playing or not.
Notes of Silly
I got my birthday entered right on the forums this time. (Last time, I switched the month & day by accident since the forum does it Europe-style.)
I’m still wearing my old Red Linen Shirt. Except during Gunship, of course. Mothafockin Goblin Rocket Pack, gettin’ in my way.
The sad part is, my new guild tabard is TOTALLY CLASHING with my Red Linen Shirt. Blue? Blue’s a really cool color, don’t get me wrong, but red is CLEARLY a better color for a tabard. The gold? Oh, the gold is just perfect.
I opened out with telling my guild about my blog. Previously, I’d just been sneaky and putting it in my guild signature. But it’s obvious now. (Also, ‘sup, Maer!)
I’m going to have to redo my toon/guild pages, again. Oh, I’ll have fun, but just so you know when it changes on you. I think I want to go back to emphasizing my realm-guild relationship. I was explaining to Lissanna on Twitter when I had a kerfluffle on Feathermoon that I’m pretty monogamous on servers when it comes to guilds. My alts are either in my main’s guild or they’re unguilded. Even cross-faction; Sphaira, on Eonar, is guildless, because so far as I know, <The Gods of Eonar> don’t have a Horde doppelganger guild. So if I ever say I’ve left a guild, but you know my toons haven’t moved from yours, you know it’s a whole ‘nother server that I’m talking about.
I’m quite aware that I posted yesterday about our Sindy 25 kill, and it’s got Conspiracy written all over it. Well, Conspiracy totally did it, not UR, so it’s staying Conspiracy on the image forever. The only other prettified kill shot I have for Conspiracy is Dreamwalker 25. So here’s to great memories of killing Internet Dragons!
I’ve been talking more and logging on longer on Elune. I’m starting with just helping to stock the guild bank, mainly because I don’t find fishing as horrendously boring as my other guildies seem to. I’m being social and liking it. ZOMG!